


Making Friends With My Demons

by NotSoSaneScientist



Category: Until Dawn (Video Game)
Genre: Climbing Class, Everybody Lives, Josh Lives, Multi, Wendigo, bathing bird - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-07
Updated: 2016-05-19
Packaged: 2018-06-06 02:25:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,613
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6734209
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NotSoSaneScientist/pseuds/NotSoSaneScientist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the horror that went on in the mountains, the crew was lucky enough to escape with their lives. We'll, everyone but Josh at least. Right before he had to chance to leave, Josh was scooped up by the empty shell of hunger he used to call his sister. <br/>Of course, this seemed like his end. but, the persistent, stubborn nature of a fee of his friends, along with his family, helped lead a search crew right to him. Finding him only minutes after consuming his first batch of human flesh, they were able to remove the contents of his stomach and free him of the spirit possessing him.</p><p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p><p>If you're looking for closure after the not-too-good ending for Josh, this is what you were looking for. I've been moping because of that trash ending and I just really needed something I could use to give myself some relief.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Black

**Author's Note:**

> ***** I'll warn you now that this fic will contain a nice amount of horror, gore, and depression. I won't focus on it of course, but it'll be in there now and again. I'll make sure to warn you before each chapter if there's going to be anything heavy.*****

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Josh is stuck in the mines now, and the darkness is starting to drive him insane. He has to keep himself alive and ignore his aching hunger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings:  
> ***Graphic violence/ gore***  
> *** Death mention***  
> ***suicide mention***

**"Fuck. Fuck. Fuck."** Joshua frantically looked around, but all he could see was black static. "where's mike? d-did _that thing_ kill him?”

 

Josh could feel his head throbbing. Honestly, that was all he could feel. Everything was numb, cold and wet, he couldn't even think. Not that he even wanted to think about what was happening right now. _Was that really Hannah? Th-That monster? Was Sam right?_ "no. No way. This is all just another one of my delusions. I'm fucking crazy. I'll snap back into reality any second now... But this feels too real, way too real to be one of my made up scenarios. What the fuck am I supposed to do?"

 

Real or not, Josh knew he had to get out of there, he can't keep letting his own mind torture him like this. Josh stumbled forward, dragging his feet as he used all of his strength to move forward. He couldn't see a way out, he couldn't see anything. He wasn't even sure if his eyes were even open at this point. Josh reached out in-front of himself, trying to get a better idea of where he was. All he got was a shooting pain that traveled up his arm, spreading through the entire left side of his body. "Shit! This is real, Ash stabbed me. Fuck. FuckFuckfuck. I'm gonna bleed out down here. Sam left us and now I'm going to die down here. **GOD** I just want Sam, Why'd she leave us?”

 

Josh collapsed to his knees, wrapping his arms around his own head, trying to shield himself from the pain, the loneliness. "I'm sorry.. I'm so sorry... Alan was right... This was all a dumb idea and now I'm going to die. Now i deserve to die. Why did I act so selfish? I'm a spoiled BRAT and I DESERVE TO DIE DOWN HERE!" His eyes flooded with tears, he curled up onto his side. Everything was starting to sink in. "I'm going to end up just like Hannah." He thought. He knew he was going to die alone, but he didn’t imagine anything like this. He let his body sink into the cold, mud caked ground. He started to let his mind drift, What else was he supposed to do?

 

Josh started to think about his friends, well, ex-friends. _Fuck I hope they’re all okay_ . Regret settled over him like the icy snow outside. _I really went too far this time_ . He remembered how distraught Mike was over Jessica’s supposed death. But Mike apologized, so that must mean she’s still alive… Or maybe just that someone else had killed her. And that thing dragged Mike down, maybe he’s dead too now. _God, what did I do?_ At least Sam got away. Hopefully Chris got out of here too. _For all I know, everyone is dead and it’s all my fault._

 

His thoughts were cut off by a high screeching and a dim light. Josh pressed his palms against the sides of his head, in efforts to stop the maddening noise. “Go AWAY!” He yelled back. “Leave me ALONE! You’re not real!” But the noise only grew louder, and the light drifted closer. “STOP! GO AWAY!” Normally, Josh would assume it was his mind and try to brush it off. But after all that went on today, with all the fucked up shit he’s gone through, anything could be real. The noise got louder, heading straight for his skull. Josh closed his eyes, begging for it to be over. _Just Kill me already._ The noise was unbearable at this point. The noise sounded as if someone were twisting a cat's joints in circles. It reminded him of all the screaming he had caused. All the pain. One scream got to him in particular. The god awful noise that Sam let out in the cinema room. When she saw Josh clean cut in half. Josh couldn’t help but cringe when he heard that noise. That was the moment he first started to regret everything. Her pain replayed over and over again in his head. He couldn’t take it, Tears gushed from his eyes. Whatever this thing was, he deserved whatever it was about to do to him.

 

He felt pressure on his side, cold palms pressing into his torso. He didn’t dare open his eyes. He didn’t want to know what was happening. He was too scared that he’d investigate and see that tall creature that looked so much like his dear sister. He just curled up more and sobbed. The presence of hands promptly turned into a million thick, burning needles. Josh could already imagine all the blood, but before he could scream, the pain was gone. Everything was gone and he felt numb again. He was terrified, scared out of his wits and he had no idea what was happening.

 

* * *

For hours on end, Josh just laid there. Unable to move, unable to see. He tried to sleep, but it was too cold, his body was way too stiff to ever relax that much. He didn’t say anything, he couldn’t think about what was happening. He was just there, paralyzed. His arm didn’t hurt anymore, neither did his head, but somehow he was still in pain. Joshua felt so weak, he just wanted to die already. He didn’t like suffering like this. No concept of time, he didn’t even know where he was at.

 

His pain was starting to distinguish itself a bit more. It was coming from his gut. It felt like his stomach was caving in. Twisting and turning, trying to rip itself out of his body. He needed food, he’s been hungry before, starving even, he remembered that he used to be too fucked up to eat. It hurt, but it was never this bad. He wanted to scream but all he could do was let out quiet sobs. He shook and shifted to clench his stomach, digging his nails into his own flesh. _I can’t take this. Make it stop… please… make it stop_. Josh couldn’t move again, his sobbing slowly quietly, not sure if he was calming down, or just losing feeling again. Everything slowed until time itself seemed to stop. Then his mind went black.

 

* * *

Josh weaved in and out of consciousness. Waking up to just feel the same hunger throughout his entire body. He could barely crawl through the mine, searching for something to eat. Most of the time, he blacked out before he could find anything. Now and again he would find a rodent that had gotten lost and started to rot for some reason or another. They never helped. The hunger was always the same, crippling pain weakening him more and more every day.

 

* * *

Josh shivered and squinted his eyes open. He’s gotten a little more used to the dark by now, able to make out where walls end and begin. He squirmed and struggled to his feet. He felt so weak, he had to do something about it, all this pain is too much. Josh clutched his gut and waddled around. He stumbled through the mines until he reached a ledge. Underneath it, water. “O-Oh shit. This is where that… that _thing_ was. When i-it took Mike.” Josh stepped back, terrified. “I can’t go back down there…” His stomach growled and churned, sending a nauseating feeling all the way to his throat, “I guess I don’t really have a choice, do I? I need to stop this pain.”

 

Josh swallows down the fear and slowly climbs down, his shivers worsening as he lowered into the freezing pond. Josh’s toes hit the bottom, and he tensed up, waiting for something to grab his ankle. He groaned and dragged his body through the water. He could feel the cold getting closer to his bone with every second and he knew he was slowing down. Using what little strength he had left, he found another ledge. He reached his arm out and gripped onto it as tight as he could. Reaching with his other arm, he tried to pull himself up, pushing his feet against the ledge wall. He was almost over, when he lost grip and his upper body dropped back, sending his entire body under the water. Josh panicked and quickly pushed himself to the surface, gasping for air and bolting to cling to the ledge. The damp air was even worse now, the cold wasn’t numbing his pain anymore, it was making it worse. All of his bones ached and he didn’t want to move.

 

Josh had already accepted death again, ready to let go, just drown himself. He loosened his grip but froze when he smelled something, it smelled wonderful. It was something familiar but Josh couldn’t quite put a finger on what it was. His pain seized and out of nowhere came a bolt of energy. He grabbed tight to the ledge, and this time managed to climb up. His stomach screamed at the smell as it got stronger. Josh pushed himself to his feet and stumbled forward, swaying to each side with every step. He had no clue why his body was so invested in this new scent, but it had to have been something good, something that would save him. After practically dragging his limbs for an hour, he saw a shadow hanging from the ceiling, swaying back and forth. This was where the smell was coming from, maybe it was a deer or something, it’s huge. Josh held out an arm to grab one of the limbs, that's when he felt something, that it wasn’t covered in fur… It was fabric. Josh’s eyes widened as he looked up, to take in the entire image. It was human, _a human fucking corpse. Is this seriously what I smelled?_ Josh wanted to vomit, his gut threw itself into knots, there was no way he was eating that, he’d rather die.

 

After several minutes of blank stares, Josh broke. _I don’t really have the choice now either do I? I’m clearly not dying anytime soon. I’m in so much pain and eating this…. P-person is going to help me._ He gripped it’s ankle and tugged, trying to free the body and pull it down. Disturbingly, he heard a crack and the corpse’s leg popped off. Startled, Josh screamed and fell backwards, the leg flopping onto his chest. Josh shoved it away and gagged, his breath heightened and his joints froze. “I-I can’t do this! I-I can’t I just can’t!” Josh was breathing so fast he began to choke on his own air, sitting up only to hunch over and start dry heaving. The pain in his gut begged for attention, causing him to cry out. Josh gripped onto his gut and tried to relax, he _had no choice._ He turned and grabbed the rotting limb, squeezing his eyes shut before taking a bite. The flesh was soft and wet, causing it to just about dissolve in his mouth. It tasted disgusting, but for some reason he couldn’t stop eating it. He kept sinking his teeth deeper and deeper, stopping only when his teeth slammed into bone, nearly snapping.

 

Before he realized, the leg was picked clean, and soon was the rest of the body. His pain barely subsided, he knew he needed more. Josh scurried across the floor, grabbing each bone to check for any left residue, or moisture, or anything that could ease his pain more. But he couldn’t find anything. Josh panicked and threw one of the bones into the wall, he needed more, he _really_ needed more. His heart raced as he ran the the other end of the room. Maybe there’s another body somewhere. Another shadow appeared in the distance, a ball. Maybe it was a fruit or something, not what Josh needed. Enraged, he tripped over to grab the figure. He dug his nails in it when he picked it up, that’s when the smell emerged again. Josh’s eyes widened and he took a closer look at the ball, _Holy Shit_ , that’s a face. Josh couldn’t help but lick his lips when he turned the skull in each palm. He hated himself for this but the urge to eat was so fucking strong.

 

Josh heard a noise, which startled him a bit, but he was too eager to eat to pay much attention. He wrapped his jaw around his ‘fresh’ meal, and started to clean to the bone. In the corner of his eye, Josh saw a light flickering, he hadn’t seen light like that in ages. The light was quickly followed by voices, “Hey! I think there’s a survivor down here!” Josh froze and lifted his head to see too heavily dressed men, waving around flashlights. He’s been in the dark so long, the light actually hurt his eyes.

  
“H-Hey! Are you alright???” Josh just growled in response, his vision was starting to go all fuzzy and his body numbed. He knew he was about to pass out again. He wanted to be excited, they were probably here to save him. But he was just angry. He was mad that they took so long, that he’d been stuck down here, mad that they didn’t find his sister, that they stopped him from eating. Didn’t they know how much pain he’s been in? As his rage grew, his vision darkened. One of the men shouted. “What the- w-wait! Backup!” Josh stood up and tried to lunge forward but everything faded to black.


	2. Safe Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The crew found Josh and he's in the hospital now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> not really any trigger warnings for this chapter. there's a mentions of the gore that happened in the last chapter, but that's about it.
> 
> EDIT: I did change this chapter a bit. Mainly just removed the awkward interaction with the doctor

When Josh woke up, he was in a hospital. He looked down at his feet, the pain in his stomach was gone. He scrunched his nose at the smell of cleaning supplies, it sure beat the wet-dirt smell of the mines, but it was still a bit excessive. Everything was so clean, white and stainless. The machines around him were beeping and there was a tube going straight to hi veins through his wrist. He wasn’t sure how he got there, but his whole face hurt a bit. Nothing awful, but they probably just had him pumped full of drugs. His eyes shifted slightly to the left and followed a thin, shiny ribbon up to a set of balloons with “Get Well Soon!” plastered on both sides. Josh squinted, a little comforted by the gesture, but still confused. His gaze drifted a bit more to the side, there was someone propped up in the chair next to his bed, but the way they were slumped over showed that they clearly weren’t conscious. Josh tried to focus his eyes, but he couldn’t see anything from that side and it just made his headache worse, so he tried to relax. Twisting his whole body just enough, he stared at the person who was now in front of him. They slowly came into focus, his wider figure, with a cellphone in hand, his blond hair, and lively pink skin flushed warmth over Josh’s body. It was Chris. Josh felt tears building up behind his eyes, he was finally home.

 

Josh tried to roll to the edge of his bed, reaching his arm out towards Chris. He wanted to wake him up without startling him. But he mainly just wanted to touch him. Chris looked really warm and he needed to make sure this was real. His hand outstretched and his fingers spread, his heart racing. He managed to brush a few fingers against Chris’s knee before losing balance and crashing face-first into the weirdly clean ground. Without thought, Josh let out a high yelp, more from being startled rather than pain. Chris hopped up nearly on beat with the noise, his eyes widened and he quickly cradled Josh, lifting him and ever so gently laying him in the bed. Josh shook slightly while he was in the air, expecting to come crashing back down. Chris was never strong enough to lift Josh.  _ I know for a fact that he hasn’t been working out. _

 

Chris chuckles and pats his shoulder. “You’ve gotten pretty light bro. You alright? How’d you fall like that?”

 

_ I just wanted to touch you… _ Josh thought he was talking. He reached out and tugged on Chris’s sleeve.

 

Chris swallows and looks around, waiting for a verbal response, but he got nothing, so he continued. “Are you hungry? Because Sam left with your mom to grab some breakfast. The doctor said you can eat solid food as soon as you think you’re ready…” He pointed to his own mouth. “Just make sure you’re cautious with your… your teeth.”

 

Josh squinted and repeated his gesture on himself.  _ My teeth? _ Chris nodded.  _ What’s wrong with my teeth? _ Josh squinted more and felt around with his tongue. Right side felt normal, but as his tongue slid further and further to the left, his teeth started to feel sharper and sharper. Most of them were missing, and the ones that weren’t felt like long daggers shooting from his gums. His eyes widened in horror. Chris paused and shifted to grab his phone, opening up the front camera and handing it to josh. Josh was afraid to look, but he way too curious not to. He pulled the camera to his face and his pupils dilated, his face was all kinds of fucked up. First, there was his teeth, two crooked fangs hung out of the left side of his mouth, Josh couldn’t even close his lips on that side. After the edges of his lip, behind those teeth, a huge joker-like scar stretched up his cheek. He gulped as he met gaze with his own eyes. The left one, the one he was having trouble seeing out of, was cloudy white and drained of all color. Josh shook more, he had another light scar on his forehead, but he was too worried about the rest of his face to care. “I-I’m a.. M-monster…” He managed to choke a few words out before handing the phone back, he couldn’t look anymore.

 

”You look fine. It’s not that bad.” Chris shrugged, but Josh knew he was lying. He frowned and looked back at the balloons. The colors were soft, one pink and one blue, they gave him a cozy feeling. Chris noticed his staring and smiled. “Sam brought those for you. A bit cheesy right? Everyone pitched in and we got you some flowers too.” He pointed towards the nightstand near Josh’s head. Josh shifted a bit to look, and like Chris suggested, there was a large vase of flowers next to him with a lavender envelope taped to the side. Josh grabbed it and yanked it off, glancing at chris before tearing the top of the envelope off. He pulled out the card and Chris just smiled. The Card was a soft yellow on the outside with the cheesy “get well soon” phrase he’s already heard so much. He peeled it open to see 7 notes scribbled on the inside, all in different handwriting. He recognized each person’s individual fonts,  _ that must mean everyone made it out of there _ :

  
  


Jess wrote right at the top of the inside cover.  _ ”Hey Josh! I hope you’re feeling okay. The room you’re in looked a bit dull so we got you some flowers. I hope you’re able to go home soon! :)” _

 

Mike wrote his dead across the seam which made his sloppy writing a bit difficult to decipher.  _ ”Hey man, I’m glad you’re back. I can’t believe they found you. I’ll talk to ya when they let you go.” _

 

In the middle of the first side was Matt’s, spread out across the page.  _ ”What’s up bud. We’ll have to hang out when you get out, we all missed you.” _

 

Emily’s writing was at the bottom, it was always so neat, almost weirdly neat.  _ “I’m glad you’re back honey, i really missed you and so did everyone else. I’ll see you soon. :)” _

 

What ashley wrote was short and it looked rushed. She was obviously still scared of him. Josh tried not to frown at the faked joy in her note.  _ ”We got you some flowers. I hope you feel better. _ ”

 

After Ashley’s, Josh didn’t really want to read anymore, they were probably all fake. But his eyes kept going down the line until it hit what Chris wrote. His was longer than all the first ones.  _ ”What’s up bro? Sam and I decided that we’re going to take shifts watching you while you’re still out cold, so I’m sorry if I’m not there when you wake up. Everyone is super excited to see you. We got you flowers, I knew you’d think it was lame, but Sam and Jess insisted. Anyway, I’m super excited to get some hang time with my bro! :]” _

 

Last was Sam’s. It was about the same size as Chris’s, but a lot easier to read.  _ “I’m thrilled you’re alright Josh, we’ve all already got so much planned when you’re up and moving again. It’s probably going to be a little hard getting used to everything out here again, but I’m going to be there for you and we’re all going to help you out <3 :)” _

 

Josh smiled a bit at the last two, couldn’t really feel his face enough to smile any bigger. He closed the card and set it back down beside him. When he looked back up, Chris was on his phone. Josh groaned and swatted at it, barely getting out a “C’mon man..”

 

“Dude, I’m just texting your mom, they’re almost back.” Chris pulled his arms away and lifted the phone out of Josh’s reach.

 

Josh groaned and laid back to stare at the ceiling. Josh didn’t miss this part of Chris. The always-on-his-phone Chris. Josh tried to ignore it, _ I guess mom’s an important person to be talking to right now. _ Josh just layed there for a bit, listening to the tapping of chris’s thumbs, and little ‘blewp’ sound it made every time he hit a button. It was a bit relaxing. Josh yawned, immediately regretting it when a pain shot from his jaw down the side of his neck. He flinched and shut his mouth. Chris glanced over, concern shining in his eye. “You alright bro?”

 

Josh opened his mouth to respond, but the door began to creep open and he got distracted. He heard bags rustling and crumpling and the doorway was empty for a few seconds, but then a head poked through. The new person covered her mouth in amazement and hurried over to josh. As she got closer Josh could make out her face. It was his mom, but she looked a lot different. Most of her hair was grey now, it was a lot thinner too. Her skin looked drained of color and dark rings surrounded her eyes, just like when they lost his sisters. She leaned in and hugged him tight, her bony shoulder jabbing him in the throat. He coughed a bit and hugged her back with only a quarter of the force she was using. She cradled his head and he leaned into it, he really missed being held like this. Josh was glad to be in her arms, but he still felt terrible. She looked so sick and drained of life and it was all his fault, all because he wanted to pull that dumb prank. His hands shook as he rubbed her back.  _ I’m so sorry… _

 

She let go to cup his face in her hands, tears already pouring out of her eyes. “Oh my little Joshua. I’m so glad you’re alright, I thought I lost you.” Josh just felt even worse. He forced a smile as she pulled away. Sam walked out from behind her and handed chris a paper bag. Josh just stared. “Are you hungry Joshua?” His mom got his attention.

 

Sam smiled and gestured towards the bag, a goofy grin growing from cheek to cheek. “We got bagels!”

 

Sam’s smile was always contagious and Josh couldn’t help but chuckle. “Bagels a-are boring….. What are you laughing a-at? Fucking dweeb.” Josh’s mom tensed up, normally she’d yell at him for using such foul language, but she decided to let it pass this time. Sam giggled and threw a punch at his shoulder, slowing almost completely to keep from hurting him. Josh chuckled and tried to hit her back, his fist lightly grazing her hip. His mom quickly chimed in, excited that her son was acting so lively. “Are you feeling better? Can you sit up?”

 

”I dunno.. I-I feel fine I guess..” Josh tried to push himself upright, it didn’t hurt, but it felt like lifting 1,000 pounds. He eventually got himself upright and Sam quickly shoved a few pillows under his back to hold him there. “How did I get here? Everything is still really fuzzy…”

 

Chris opened his mouth but was quickly cut off by Josh’s mom. “That’s not important right now sweetie, all that’s important is that you’re alright.” Chris blinked and raised a brow, but quickly just shrugged it off. Josh squirmed a bit, he hated when his mom hid things from him, that means it was something bad. “What about my teeth?”

 

”The doctor referred us to a dentist who can replace them with some fake ones for us. It’s gonna be alright.” She reassured. “But you look fine as it is, so don’t worry sweetie.” Josh just shrugged, that wasn’t the answer he wanted. He wanted to know  _ why _ they were like they were, not what they were going to do about it. He sighed and reached for the bag in Chris’s hand, Chris promptly handed it over. Josh dug through it, grabbing the one that looked biggest and yanking it out. 

 

Chris grabbed the bag back and took one for himself, quickly chomping into it and smiling. Josh picked at his a bit and flipped it in his hand. He pushed it towards his mouth but frose when he remembered the last time he ate. He remembered how awful it tasted, how it was soaked in mud and it was basically digested before he put it in his mouth. He remembered how he couldn’t stop himself from eating it, how it took over his body and made him lose control…

 

Josh dropped the bagel and hunched forward with a coughing fit that quickly turned into gagging. He clutched his gut as the gruesome images flashed through his head. His mother quickly ran over to rub his back and she gripped his shoulder. “What’s wrong Joshua?? What is it???” 

Josh slowly calmed down and buried his face in his palms. “I’m just… I’m not hungry right now,”  _ That was a lie. _ “I don’t really like bagels that much anyway, it’s fine.”  _ That was a lie too. _

 

“A-are you sure? You can lay back down if you need to…” She kept rubbing his back.

 

“I’m fine…” Josh shrugged, “Don’t stress about it, I’ll eat later.” The thought of eating at all made him want to gag again. He tossed the bagel back at the bag, chuckling and pumping his fist a bit when it made it in. “When.. When can we leave? I don’t like being stuck in this bed.”

 

“They have to run a few tests while you’re awake, so probably not until tomorrow if you’re body is functioning alright.” Sam grinned. “Then we can go on a hike, Get blood pumping through your legs!” ‘Josh rolled his eyes but he couldn’t hold back from grinning back. He always thought that Sam’s obsession with nature and fitness was dumb, but he also thought Chris’s lack of interest in nature and fitness was dumb. Josh chuckled to himself. Both of his friends were total nerds, just on different sides of the spectrum. “There’s nothing I’d want to do more than take a hike with you.” The sarcasm in his voice was heavy and Sam just rolled her eyes back at him.

 

Chris was already back to looking down at his phone. “No one wants to wear themselves down in the ‘wonderful outdoors’ with you Sam. We should go to an arcade or something instead, binge play Pac Man until we get the highscore spot.” He chuckled at his screen. Josh couldn’t tell if he was laughing at what he just said or whatever was on his phone. Josh sighed, “so, who ya talking to?” He already knew the answer.  _ Ashley. _

 

“Just Ashley.” Chris basically repeated Josh’s thoughts.

 

“Oh… Well… are you two a thing yet?” Josh didn’t know why he asked, he really didn’t want to know.

 

“I-I uh… I dunno…..” Chris shrugged and rubbed his arm. For some reason This answer offended him more than what he thought Chris would say. With all the things Josh did to set those two up? How are they not together yet? They experienced a tragedy together and everything!?  _ Chris literally had  _ **_a gun_ ** _ up to his head and he didn’t ask her??? _ “What do you mean you ‘dunno’? You’re seriously still not with her?” Josh pressed, Chris was such a coward.

 

“I dunno… I just… We hang out and stuff a lot a-and she sleeps over sometimes now, but I’m just- I don’t think we can make it official yet… I don’t wanna like, weird her out, ya know?”

 

“At least I know you didn't go and change on me.” Josh chuckled, but his grin twitched with irritation.

 

There was a gentle knock before the door slid open again. It was a short, fit looking gentleman with dark hair and a clean face. His deep blue scrubs made it obvious that he was the nurse, and his tag had ‘Damien’ drawn on it in cutsie round letters. A warm but obviously faked smile grew on his face. “Oh, you’re awake! How nice, how are you feeling?”

 

“Fine, I guess. My jaw hurts.” Josh shrugged.

 

“Great! That’ll wear off soon, your uh… fangs just re-positioned how your jaw sits and it’s going to be a little sore until it settles, nothing abnormal.” His smile grew, it looked a bit painful.

 

“So you’re telling me these teeth are normal?”

 

“Well uh… anything but, actually. I just meant that you have nothing to worry about, we’ll just have to run a few tests while you’re still up and you’ll be free to go home tomorrow morning!”

 

“Tomorrow? How many tests are there?” Josh groaned, he still wasn’t sure what was happening and he definitely didn’t want anymore ‘testing’. They did enough of that when they were telling him how fucked up he was. “I don’t wanna stay here until tomorrow.”

 

“I know you’ve been away from home for almost two months now, but these tests are crucial to-”

 

“Only two months?” Josh cut him off. “Is that really how long I’ve been out?”  _ It felt like a year.  _ The nurse nodded, his smile fading into concern. “You were missing for approximately 35 days, and you’ve been in an unresponsive state for about 19 days. I know that seems like ages, so we’re going to get you home as soon as we can.”

 

“I wasn’t missing, I was stuck. I thought Sam and Mike knew where it was… why’d it take you so long to find me?” Josh paused and his nostrils flared. “Do you know how much pain I was in? Dude I was  _ starving _ down there!”

 

Sam flinched a bit, grabbing Josh’s shoulder to try and relax him. “J-Josh, everyone thought you were dead. I told the investigators to go down in the mines, but Mike told me you were dead. H-He told me that he watched that thing drag you away, that he knew it killed you. People were looking, but no one knew that you survived.”

 

“And with your friends informing us that it was too dangerous to go out at night, we really had to space out the searches, we barely had any time to look when we got the chance.” The nurse looked uncomfortable, nearly choking on his words. Josh recognized the glimmer of fear in his eyes and he hugged himself. He didn’t like how everyone was obviously still afraid of him knowing what he did. He just wanted things to go back to normal and he wanted to forget about what he did to them, he already served his punishment. Pure isolation, it was the worst feeling he had ever had and he just wanted to forget about it all. Josh managed to mumble an “I understand…” Sam rubbed his back a bit and he leaned into it.

 

“Well if you don’t have any more questions, I’m going to let the doctor know that you’re up and then he’ll be here shortly to run some tests.” The nurse left with a smile. Josh had more questions, but he knew he wasn’t getting real answers from anyone so he kept quiet. He leaned more into Sam’s hand, which was now resting still between his shoulder blades. He was too tired to talk to anyone now, his jaw was starting to get all sore again. He leaned over to rest his head on Sam’s side. She ran her hand up his back so she could stroke his hair. Josh frowned a bit, he knew he didn’t deserve all this affection, but he accepted it anyways. He really needed it.

 

About ten minutes later, another man in scrubs walked in. He was taller than the other guy. He was a lot less cleaned up, with a bit of a shadow and hairs out of place on his head, but something about him made him come off as a lot more professional. He had a deep scar across the bridge of his nose that drew Josh’s attention. Josh tried to read his name tag but his one working eye wasn’t really doing a good job. The man let off a soft smile and pushed a wheelchair into the room as he entered. “Are you ready to let us take a few tests? We have to make sure you’re healthy enough to go back with your parents. After we’re done, we’re probably going to have you spend one more night here. Just to make sure you’re not about to pass out on us again.”

 

“Yeah, I guess. Doubt I have a choice either way.” Josh shrugged. The doctor just nodded and spun the chair so that the seat was facing him. “We’re gonna wheel you down to the lab.” He held out an arm for Josh. Josh leaned away from his outstretched arm and pushed himself to the edge of his bed. The doctor hovered his arm behind Josh’s back to make sure he didn’t fall back. Josh lifted himself with his arms and slowly spun his body to sit in the chair. He leaned back and sighed.  The doctor smiled again. “You three can sit in here or in the waiting room, but he won’t be back for at least a few hours.” And with that he pushed Josh out.

 

The doctor smiled and wheeled him down the hall. The hallway seemed to run on forever and it made Josh feel a bit light headed. “What happened to me?” He pushed out.

 

“What do you mean?” The doctor quickly responded.

 

“You know… How’d I get here?”

 

“One of the search teams found you. I guess you tried to attack them. They had to use a CEW to knock you out.” He shrugged, he seemed oddly unfazed.

 

“I-Is that it?... like, what about after that?” Josh choked, remembering the last thing he ate.

 

“Well when they got to you, you were missing teeth. We thought it was normal, but then all of them on the left side fell out, and canine-like teeth started to grow in their place. You had also lost sight in your left eye, and your right was starting to go. But we’ve gotten everything under control now.” The doctor pointed to the corresponding spots on his own face as he talked.

 

“Do you know… why?” Josh rubbed his arm, “Like why I was changing like that?”

 

He glanced to each side before giving an answer. “Well, we believe that you were possessed… You do understand all that wendigo lore your friends where talking about, don’t you?”

  
“I guess so…” Josh shrugged again, he knew his sister was one, but that’s about it. The doctor got to a new room with wider doors. He stepped from behind the chair to open the doors and wheel Josh inside. “Well that’s what you are. When they found you, you were munching on a nice human corpse. I don’t know how that man got down there, but it was the other person we were looking for. You definitely weren’t yourself when you got here, so your parents eventually had you exorcised. It worked, without the demon inside of you, you can’t transform any further.” Somehow, the doctor could say all this while keeping a welcoming smile on his face. “Now let’s get these tests over with so we can get you home. I know that's all you want me to say.”


	3. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Josh gets to finally go home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EDIT: I did change this chapter a bit. Mainly just removed the awkward interaction with the doctor
> 
> ***WARNINGS***  
> -Excessive gore  
> -hallucinations

The next few hours were boredom hell. They tested his reflexes, his grip. They tested his vision and made sure he could move his jaw. They all seemed pointless to Josh. When he was finally wheeled back to his room, no one was there. Josh sighed and maneuvered himself back into his bed, laying against the headboard and glancing around. “If you don’t mind,” The doctor cut off his silence as he sat on the foot of Josh’s bed. “I’d like to know what you remember from the mines.”

 

“I do mind.” Josh turned away, he didn’t want to think about that anymore.

 

  “It can be just between us two Joshua.” He pressed, “My lips are sealed.”

 

“I said I don’t want to talk about it.”

 

The doctor paused and adjusted his glasses. “I understand. I didn't mean to upset you” His warm smile returned to his face as he rubbed the back of his neck. “sometimes I let my curiosity get the best of me.”

 

Josh just nodded in response.

 

Sam walked back in just as the doctor stood up. He spun to give her a quick wave before taking off. Sam waved back then made her way over to Josh. “Chris took your mom out for dinner, she’s really happy you’re finally coming home.”

 

Josh hugged himself. “When are we leaving?”

 

“Tomorrow morning Chris is going to come sign you out. I have a yoga class I’ll have to get to, and I figured you wouldn’t want to be dragged into that with me.” She let out a gentle laugh.

Josh repeated the same laugh back to her, “You know me so well.” He stopped and his smile began to fade. “You’re staying, right? Like overnight?”  


Sam shrugged, snickering to herself. “Yeah, I had to convince them I was your girlfriend. Something about ‘ _only family can stay past visiting hours_ ’ or something dumb and I guess your significant other is considered family. You’re mom almost peed herself when I said it. Pretty hilarious.” She looked pretty entertained.

 

Josh chuckled back to her. He remembered his mom asking if they were ever going to date after he started confiding in her. He could already see his mom squealing over it. “ _She’s_ hilarious. I love her.”

 

Sam smiled and sat over in the row of chairs near the wall. “So… Are you feeling better?”

“Physically? Yeah, sure. Emotionally? No, not really.”

 

“Hey.” Sam leaned forward, resting her hand on his arm. Something about her touch and her voice when she got like this, it made Josh feel safe. It used to always snap him back into reality when he had his ‘episodes’. “Once we get you back home, we’re all going to be there for you. Like always.”

 

“Like always?” Josh squinted. “You say that like other people cared about me. You and Chris were the only two who would ever even think about wasting your time one me. Not even my parents gave me the light of day!” It hurt to think about it, but Josh knew it was true and he just had to say it.

 

Sam’s warm glow didn’t fade and she gently ran her thumb back and forth against his wrist. “People do care. Just… Not everyone is too good at showing it. You gotta trust me on this one Josh.”

 

Josh just shrugged in response. Sam sighed and moved from her seat to wrap both of her arms around him. Josh didn’t hug her back, but he didn’t move away either. Sam smiled and stretched her hand around the back of his head for support. She sighed and buried her face in the indent above his collar bone. Josh rolled his eyes and eventually hugged her back. She could always break him, make him open up. Even when he didn’t want to. “Thanks Sam…” He mumbled. “I know I can count on you.”

 

She smiled and pulled away, looking accomplished. “Good. Now you should try and get some sleep. You can’t tackle tomorrow head on if you’re half asleep!”

 

Josh smiled and shrugged. “I’m not that tired, so don’t try to stay up to ‘ _watch over me_ ’ or whatever. You need sleep too.”

 

“Don’t worry, I wasn’t planning on it. I’d like to get my rest. Just wake me up if you need something. _Anything._ ” And with that, she leaned back to stare at the ceiling. Josh followed her gaze upward and closed his eyes. He really wasn’t tired, but he didn’t want to hear Sam nag about how he needs to take care of his body. He took in deep breaths to let in what was around with, but everything was just drowning in that bleach smell and it burned his nose. He took in the total silence and let his body relax. He let his mind drift and eventually he was out.

 

* * *

 

 

Josh felt cold and he was propped up against a wall now. He couldn’t move, like someone was holding back all of his limbs. He opened his eyes to see the all too familiar cave scene. Josh suddenly fell his stomach twist itself into knots. _Here?! What the_ **_fuck_ ** _! How can I be back here? Was that all some sick fucking hallucination?_ Josh’s thoughts were stopped when he heard a noise. A faint shriek echoed through the cave, that same blood curdling noise that had made his head feel so awful before, bouncing off the walls and beaming straight into his skull like a bullet. Then he heard footsteps. He wasn’t able to turn his head to investigate, he was only able to stare straight ahead like he was in a movie. The footsteps drew closer and josh felt his anxiety rise with every step. After staring for long enough, Josh could make out a figure, and his heart sank. It was Chris, all cut up and bruised like he was the night of the prank. His eyes looked lifeless and he just shook his head in disappointment. Josh felt the urge to rip his body to shreds, he wouldn’t stand to look Chris was shooting his way, but he had no choice but to watch. Chris stepped closer and crouched in front of him, their faces less than millimeters away. Chris just stared, with disappointment dull in his eyes. Josh felt more and more sick with every second. He tried to apologize but the words got stuck in his throat.

 

Their silence was broken after Chris shook his head. “How could you? I thought we were friends…”

 

Josh’s stomach churned. _We are friends._ The words still refused to come out.

 

“How could you put me through that? How could you put any of us through that? You think your sisters would be proud of you? They’d be sick if they knew what you did. This isn’t what they wanted.”

 

_I just wanted to help. I didn’t do anything wrong._

 

Chris stood up and Josh noticed something. His eyes. The color in his eyes were completely gone, cloudy white. His face faded to a darker shade and the color in his cheeks was muted. Josh blinked to realize he was now looking at himself. _This darkness is getting to me, the hallucinations are too much._ The figure stared at him, it was almost like looking in a mirror. The figure cocked its head as fangs began to poke out from between its lips. With the fangs came blood. First it was a few drops ran down its chin and dripped onto its shirt. Then, those drops quickly turned into a waterfall. Blood was pouring from every hole in its head. Its eyes were now tinted pink, stained with bloody tears. Blood poured from its nose, from its ears, from its eyes. Josh wanted to scream, he wanted out. His hallucinations had given him false hope and now he wasn’t ready to die anymore. He wanted to see Chris, and Sam, and his mom. He hated his mind. The tricks it played on him. It was almost like it enjoyed bringing him pain. The room started to flood with the thick red liquid. Josh couldn’t get away and it began to coat his body. The crimson lake continued to rise. The rotten scent filled his nose and the sticky, metallic taste coated his lips, inching its way inside. Josh was drowning. He couldn’t close his eyes and the overwhelming fluid filled his eye sockets. It was boiling hot and Josh couldn’t get away. Josh was coated in it and it began to burn his whole body. The dirty smell of blood quickly faded into the strong smell of bleach. Josh felt his voice coming back and he screamed as loud as his body would let him.

 

* * *

 

Josh yelled and sat up in the hospital bed. Sam was already by his side yelling his name. “Josh? Josh wake up! Josh please!”

 

Josh’s eyes snapped open and he instantly bursted into tears. He was back in the hospital again. He wasn’t sure if he was really here this time or if he’s still just seeing things. Sam cradled him in her arms, rocking him ever so slightly, helping him catch his breath. Josh leaned in against her chest. She sighed and stroked his hair. Whether this was actually reality or the cave was, he really preferred this place. Josh gripped on to Sam’s arm which was outstretched over his chest.

 

Josh’s grip loosened after a few minutes and his breathing returned to normal. He sighed and let out an “It’s fine.”

 

Sam loosened her grip but didn’t completely let go. “Are you sure? What happened?”

 

“I’m fine Sam.”

 

Sam sighed and let go, stroking his hair as a comforting gesture before she completely removed her hands. “If you say so Josh. I won’t force you to talk to me, but Chris should be here soon. I was supposed to take off a few minutes ago, but then you started freaking out, so I’ll stay a little longer so you don’t have to be alone.”

 

“No, Sam you really don’t have-”

 

“Yeah, but I want to Josh.” She cut him off, her irritation masked by her soft features. “You’re my friend. Next to Hannah you’re my best friend. So it’s my job to make sure you’re okay.”

 

Josh didn’t say anything back. He shifted his gaze back to the ceiling. _Best friend? That’s nice to hear, but I doubt she actually means it._ He sighed and began to let his thoughts surround him. He needed to sort out what was happening right now. _Am I actually here right now? There’s no way Chris was in those mines with me… but maybe just that part was an illusion, but the rest was real._

 

Josh groans and his gaze moves over to the right to see the door opening once again. Sam waved and stood as Chris walked in. Chris waved back before smiling at Josh. “I got you all signed out, we can take off whenever you’re ready.” Josh just stared. He thought he was smiling, but by the way Chris’s eyes quickly moved over to Sam, he realized he wasn’t. Sam grabbed her bag and slung it over her shoulder before giving Chris a one armed hug. “I gotta go, thanks Chris, I’ll see you soon Josh, hopefully tomorrow!” With that she rushed out the door. Chris stepped closer. “How’d you sleep?” He helped Josh into the wheelchair while he talked. “You doin alright bro?”

 

“No, I’m fine cochise, but I’m bored as Hell.” Josh gave him a half-ass smile and got himself in the chair. “Hey… Chris, let’s do something fun. I dare you to hurdle us down the hall out there while I’m in this chair. Full speed. No stopping.” Josh has been bedridden for God knows how long, he was itching to do something.

 

“What? No way, we can’t do that!” Chris objected.

 

“C’mon Cochise, don’t be a wimp. We haven’t done anything fun in like… well forever”

 

“I-I uh… I don’t know Josh…”

 

Josh rolled his eyes. “Okay man.” A small smirk started to grow on his face. “I guess I should’ve known you’d be too much of a wimp to have some fun.” Josh knew exactly how to push Chris’s buttons.

 

A soft pink invaded Chris’s cheeks and his brows furrowed. “I am not a wimp!”

 

“I mean, I’m totally fine with being friends with a wimp so don’t worry about it.” Josh pressed as his grin grew. “But I’m like 80% sure Ashley isn’t into guys who don’t know how to have fun.”

 

“I-I know how to have fun!!! F-Fine! I’ll do it!... show you man… call me a wimp...” Chris continued to mumble to himself as he helped the chair reach the door. Josh smiled as he leaned to open up the door. He could see the color drain from Chris’s face as he stared down the tiled alleyway. The halls were empty but the idea of getting in trouble made Chris’s palms sweaty. Josh cut into Chris’s nervousness with a big grin. “Full speed ahead!!”

 

Chris took a deep breath and pink stained his face. He pushed off with his feet with a firm grip on the chair handles. Chris angled his body forward, putting all his weight into pushing the chair. They shot down the hall and Josh couldn’t stop laughing. They’d reach the doors and Josh held his legs out, hoping to kick the doors open. Once they make contact, Josh’s legs just fold up, causing the chair to crash up against the glass.

 

Panic washed over Chris’s face. He spun the chair around. “Josh are you alright??? I’m so sorry dude!”

 

Josh just continued laughing, gripping onto his gut to stop the pain his joy was causing. “It’s fine! I’m fine!” He smiled and spun himself back to face the door. Chris backed him up and pushed open the door so Josh could wheel through. Josh snickered to himself as he wheeled down the ramp. Chris noticed how happy Josh looked, and it replaced his guilt with a chuckle. He hadn’t seen genuine happiness from his best friend’s face in ages. Josh leaned back and let Chris push him to the car. “Did you see the receptionist's face when we went by? She looked super pissed cochise. You better hope she doesn’t come out here.”

 

“I-I doubt-... she’s not going to come out here.” The hesitation in Chris’s voice proved he wasn’t sure about his answer, which just made Josh laugh more.

 

Chris rolled Josh over to the passenger side and opened the door. He crouched down and wrapped an arm around Josh’s back to help lift him from the chair. Josh rolled his eyes and reluctantly accepted the help. He climbed into the seat and adjusted his body until he was comfortable. Chris took the chair and disappeared behind the car. Josh waited and looked around. It smelled like brown sugar and syrup, and God the car was always a mess. _Does he even clean?_ It looked like he kept his entire wardrobe in the back. At least 13 different coats and jackets. _Who the Hell needs that many coats?_ **_I_ ** _don’t even own that many sweaters._

 

Josh was startled by the slamming of the car door as Chris hopped in. “ready to head home?” He gave Josh a big doofy smile as he buckled his seatbelt.

 

Josh replied with a slight smirk and a shrug. “I guess. I’m ready to not be here anymore, so home sounds fine.”

 

Chris started up the car. He shifted the car into drive, pausing to stare at Josh with a blank face. Josh tensed up. _Did I do something wrong?_ Chris narrowed his eyes and his glare seemed to pierce right through Josh’s chest. _Oh shit, I did something wrong. What did I say? Shit I’m really sorry,_ “What?” Josh choked.

 

Chris’s eyes shifted down, then back up. “Your seatbelt.”

 

Josh paused and looked down to see he didn’t have a safety belt on. He sighed a bit in relief. “Oh, of course. Sorry man.” he reached over his shoulder and dragged the strap across his chest and pushed it into place. As soon as it made the cute ‘click’ sound, Chris took off. Josh relaxed and leaned back again. He was a bit frustrated with himself for panicking over nothing, but he just gazed out the window. The horizon inched by ever so slowly, Chris always drove like a grandma. Josh rolled his eyes and spun the knob on the radio to blare the music. Something grungy and awkwardly edgey was on, he wasn’t sure if they were singing or if someone had just kicked them all in the throat. Chris paused and turned the radio down to a normal volume. Josh snapped his head towards Chris and shot out the first thing that came to his mind. “Wanna fight me bro?”

 

Chris laughed and shoved Josh’s shoulder. “Whatever bro. You’re going to blow out your eardrums you dork.”

 

Josh chuckled and rubbed his shoulder. _That kinda hurt_. “Wow, what a weakling.”

 

Chris laughed and rolled his eyes. “Well I wasn’t actually trying to do any damage.”

 

Josh shrugs as a response. “How far are we? I can’t remember the last time I was in this part of town.”

 

Chris slows and turns the corner. “Like five more minutes or so.”

 

Josh spun to stare out the window again. The further they drove, the more familiar everything started to look. Josh lived in a pretty rich neighborhood. A long row of mansions with big front yards. None of his neighbors ever really talked to him or his family, but Josh’s mom always tried to convince him they were nice people. Not that Josh wanted them over, he liked spending the day by himself. The only company he really ever enjoyed was Chris and Sam’s or his sisters’. Everyone just seemed like they were only pretending to care about him, and he hated feeling like a burden.

 

Chris slowed down as they reached the front gate. He tapped his fingers on the steering wheel as he waited. “Honk your horn. I doubt they know you’re out here.” Josh insisted.

 

“They know I’m here, I don’t want to be loud.” Just as Chris finished his sentence, the gate made a high buzzing sound. The gates casually swung open, and as Chris drove inside his smile grew wider. Josh’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Chris was suspiciously happy and it was kinda creepy.

 

“What’s so funny? Did I miss something?” Josh questioned him.

 

“OH! It’s nothing, I’m just glad you’re back… That’s it… Nothing else.” Chris’s smile was so goofy and fake. Josh knew he was lying but he just shrugged it off and waited for the car to stop. Once Chris pulled up he rushed to the trunk to pull out Josh’s chair and bring it over to him. Josh would already be trying to squirm out of his chair. Chris hurried to grab his arm and guide him to the chair. Josh rolled his eyes and sat back down. _I don’t need this chair, you don’t need to help me so much,_ “Thanks Chris.”

 

Chris’s grin remained wide and dopey as he pushed Josh up to the door. Josh felt a little uncomfortable as he was moved closer to the door. He wasn’t ready to go back home. He didn’t know how his parents were going to react once he was actually back.

 

Josh tensed up and kept his eyes shut as chris pushed the door open. Josh peeked when he noticed all the lights were shut off. _All the cars were here, where the Hell is everyone?_

 

Josh reached for the light. As soon as he flipped the switch he heard cheering.

 

“WELCOME HOME!” People jumped out from every piece of furniture. All his old friends were in his house now, happy to see him. Josh rubbed his eyes, expecting it all to be fake. Ashley and Jessica were behind the couch. Emily and Matt were smooshed together behind his mother’s doll cabinet. Matt stood in front of the couch like he was just sitting down before hand. And front and center was Both of his parents and Sam.

 

Chris smiled and lifted his arms. “Suprise!!!”

  
Josh tried his hardest to look casual but he accidently let a smile slip through. Melinda skipped over to hug him close, stroking his hair. Within a moment, his dad joined them. Josh hugged them back a bit and sighed. _This many people who actually give a shit about me?_ He felt nice. He was actually glad to be back home.


End file.
